Ugh! That word sums up how myself and countless others feel across the nation. We are tired. Engraged. Saddened. Traumatized. Utterly exhausted and literally looking for joy.
Can you imagine feeling all of those emotions every day in a 24 hour span? Can you imagine going to a store and having to be aware of your surroundings at all times. Or educating your child about the injustices of the world. Praying that he listens because he is still full of innocence. Can you imagine knowing that he is past the cute little black boy stage and in a few short years it'll click. Then your beautiful boy will walk through the world with a different set of eyes. Praying for something different for him.
Can you imagine dreading the day your child asks you "why do they hate me?" And you don't have an answer because you wonder the same thing. Can you imagine having so many friends and associates of different ethnic backgrounds who stay silent when you need them to speak up the most. The silence can be deadly. It makes you question if you've been blinded. Or if you ever really knew them.
Can you imagine grieving for the injustices of the world. Grieving for your people and defending why you grieve for someone you don't know. I don't have to imagine. And neither do so many people that look like me. It is the unimaginable and yet it's a daily reality.